Arrogance

The word is quiet popular, needless to say that most people use it to define someone else’s personality. The word comes with a negative connotation and if I have to search it in Google/ wikipedia for a definition then the word is defined in English language as “offensive display of superiority or self-importance; overbearing pride.” In short, the person using it, not only spoils his/her self esteem/respect but also, by virtue of his actions, make his/her surroundings suffer.

Now, if you are thinking that I am going to write a blog on this word, then I am afraid you are wrong. What I am going to write in this blog is how this word has affected me, and my personality, along with how I came to know a whole new world of usage for the word. Till now, I was always under the impression that people who are having the personality like the word itself, are to be avoided. Until, someone crowned me as arrogant. This happened with my exit interview at my ex-workplace.

Now obviously I differed in the opinions but then I realized that to a certain extent, each personality has a bit of arrogance, no matter how humble one might pretend. We are arrogant when it comes to the question about our forte. I say that we are arrogant about our forte and not “proud” because I believe there is a very thin line that divides pride and arrogance and I expect a lot of us “mortals” to tread the wrong way.

I also came across a whole new territory where this word is finding popular usage. The territory is “correcting your boss”. This again happened at my ex-workplace and I do not claim it to be omnipresent. The account that I was working for is sitting on a ticking time bomb due to real bad governance from the seniors, hence I decided to move on in life and look beyond my ex-workplace.

I was immediately taken into a room and was asked atleast 10 times as to why I am moving out rather then continuing and what can people do to retain me.

Now,

1. I do not understand why people act so defensively in here. We are not kids and we know what we are doing. So if someone decides to graduate, rather then smoothening the process why do you give a chance to him to blackmail you.

2. I get absolutely astonished in such meetings, when I was not happy and when I was there,when i was writing emails and calling meetings, none of you bothered to meet me and ask me my well being, and suddenly I am being made to look so precious for the company.

So I decided to speak my heart out every-time I was asked to meet someone on the topic. Be it my immediate bosses or people from the HR department of the company or anyone. The result though didn’t surprise me, but left a bad taste in the mouth. I was crowned arrogant with a problematic attitude, and someone who is behaving nothing short of “weird”.

Now, I decided to retrospect myself and my personality. I got confused, coz either the same people are amazing or they are amazingly foolish to have kept me there for 2 long years and continuously rated me high on my project related abilities and my personality traits.

I dug a little deeper.

In India, bosses have this super huge ego, please, not all again, but if I have to put a number to it then 90%+ will fall in this category. One has to be careful with words while pointing out their mistakes. Mince the words and send it down the throat back from where it came from in case you feel like calling your boss a buffoon (even if he or she is actually one). And still if you manage to tell your boss on this face (like the naukri adv of Hari Sadu) then you got to be mentally prepared to hear what I heard about my personality.

It did shake me up a bit, but then I at-least answered my soul; I am no more at a place where truth is termed as arrogance. People do not stand by their words; they rate people on friendship rather then the professional behavior. People get good ratings for picking and dropping their boss from the home even if one has to do a good 14 kms (close to 10 miles) extra one side. And, people who do not work on any project not only get above expectations but also get promoted.

People who know me call me careless, problem with prioritizing things, issues with memory and few other names. But none so far called me arrogant, but if I am one, then as I said I do not have a problem with it. I would just be a little careful. But if I am not, then I deserve a little better treatment then what I got. Worst, my bosses didn’t even have slightest of guts to call me and fix me up. This has actually resulted in a wrong learning which I will have to correct. End of the day a boss is a boss and he/she commands respect by mere personality. I have to unlearn every behavior trait that I picked up during last 2 yrs and learn new way coz not all bosses are buffoons, they are people to be looked upon for guidance. They do not hide behind curtains, they rather lead you from the front.

And pardon me, if I am wrong, please feel free to correct me, I am not arrogant when it comes to taking feedbacks. :)